Saturday, November 8, 2008

How To Dress European (Part Two)

I have a vlog coming as soon as I can get the internet to cooperate with me. Swear.
In the meantime, the title of this is self-explanitory. Once again, purely sarcastic and tongue in cheek. Please, a fashion blog is not a proper forum for sociocultural debate.

Someone commented on the last post that they "deadly want" to see my riff on German style. Lucky for you, I have spent half my life surrounded by Germans! Taciturn, cliched Germans who were usually my teachers and with whom I never got along particularly well. So keep in mind, my biases are fully-formed.



A German woman simply cannot bother herself with all these extraneous layers and peices, so a dress is a must.



Being German is all about being modern,and there is no room in a German wardrobe for any "vintage" references. Let's leave the past where it belongs, shall we?


Form follows function.



A German woman loves sparkly baubles, but practices restraint. "Bling" is not leitkultur, kids.

It is one of the greatest injustices of life that I was not born Scandinavian. Any of you have who have ever followed a street style blog know what I'm talking about. It seems like they're all tall and ribbon-slim, with soigne style and a creamy complexion to boot. My first time in Stockholm you will probably find me weeping in my hotel room shrieking, "I can't go outside! They're all too...beautiful."



They all have Acne....Acne Jeans clothing.



On any other person, tights as pants would be at best, a fashion faux pas, and at worst, incredibly unflattering. But the rules don't apply to you. This one has delightfully edgy leather panels.



Neutral colours as always.



And edgy shoes that no one else could walk in.

140 comments:

Anonymous said...

haha, it really does seem like you had some weird teachers .. (i swear mine look like that. EXACTLY.)
agree on the scandinavian style too. i cant even imagine people looking like this here, lol

J.Yo said...

the way you picture yourself hiding down in the hotel room cracks me up..

and i could picture a blond German woman with strong jaw lines wearing all that you described! perfect!
lol

love your blog, as usual!

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Hannah said...

These are so entertaining!

Brooke Alexandra said...

Loving your blog. I have lived in Orlando for (going on, eek) 24 years, so I feel the pain of the southern fashion blogger :) Would love to trade links if you're interested.

Rebecca Jane said...

I love acne clothing = amazing!

The Spicers said...

Love your take on German style!

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love it <3 everyone in Scandinavia aren´t beautiful, at least not in Finland lol :>

Katy said...

I love this post. I actually would wear the German coat and ring in a heartbeat!

Gerry said...

This post really made me laugh! I'm in art school right now and all my graphic design and typography teachers will talk about the preferred styles of each era and then suddenly they'll go, "But in Germany..."

idle. said...

There is very little style in the part of Germany I am currently living in. But yes, simplicity has it's charms. *rolls eyes* ^_^

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wow awesome post!
i had my eye on those tights too :)

Blair said...

Yes, those scandinavians are just too lovely!

Me in Copenhagen = Not rail-thin brunette trying to crawl back into the safety of the subway as to not be seen... :P

<3

S. said...

You really did nail the Scandinavian style..

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Maybe it is because I am a quarter German ;) hehehe

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